04 July 2013
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My favorite part of this chapter was the part where the main character
has the dream that he is fighting against the current. Only upon
reaching a higher spot on the cliff did he realize that he should not
have fought against the current, but allowed the current to carry him.
This is a really interesting point for me myself as I always try to
fight against things that are happening because I feel like I should be
in control. I don’t like the idea of being swept away with the current
because there is no telling what is at the bottom. I was rooting for the
guy as he climbed and tried to get purchase on the face of the cliff. I
wondered if the Force was telling him to fight in order to see the
potential ending. But then I have to wonder , as he was meters off the
ground, what he could have done from there to save himself. Perhaps in
another dream he would have rightly fought against the current and then
grabbed on to the cliff face only to find someone willing to give him a
hand.
I know it says in the chapter not to follow negative thoughts or
warnings, but to heed them, but I wonder if in our thoughts and dreams
if the Force just shows us a little at a time for our own benefit. One
step at a time. And if so, does each step end positively? Maybe not, but
we can see the positives in all situations in hindsight. As was the
case with Marjorie. Our main character had no way of knowing if he would
find her again once she was taken by the police. However, he did find
her in the same place that he was held up in. The untrained mind sees
this as coincidence, but he had been following his questions all along.
Of course he could find the answer.
I found the answer I was looking for to this question: “Does each step
end positively?” There is a scripture I like to recite which reads:
“And we know that all things work together for the good to them that
love the Lord, to them that are called according to his purpose” (Romans
8:28). A former pastor of mine used to say “It’s going to be alright in
the end and if it’s not alright it’s not the end.” Maybe things are
working out for my good and I don’t see them.
I look back on where I was a year ago and I am a completely different
person. I was petrified at the prospect of being by myself in my own
place and I was more concerned than healthy about my family drama. I
simply wonder what it will be like one year from now when I am 28 and
looking back on this entry. I know my question: How do I live a life
that is defined by WHO I AM, not what I do?
Now to find the sub-questions that will lead me there.
It may be time for me to begin keeping a dream/daydream/thought/question journal.
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